media.tenor.com
a black and white photo of a man wearing a hat and a scarf
Alt: A black and white zoom-in of Harry Lime (played by Orson Welles) in The Third Man
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- 💙 Liked by 2 users
- 📅 Updated over 2 years ago
- ⚙️ Provider skyfeed.me
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“You seem really chill” I’m dead inside
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Please stop sending highly-skilled assassins to murder me. It's mean and it hurts my feelings
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It is with a heavy heart that I leave the UFO message board
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The pottery scene in Ghost but it's me & Mr. Bean sculpting a giant meatball
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In 6th grade I was battle rapping against my friend Jeff and my mom walked in to bring us apple slices
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Her eyes sparkling with tears, Koko the Gorilla signs one last message for mankind. "More like Breaking Good," she says, collapsing to the ground
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I hate when you’re playing Monopoly and you land in jail and you’re having a conjugal visit with your wife and Nana starts crying
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You will be visited by three spirits
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Happiness is a myth perpetuated by Big Happy
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No, I don't want to hold your baby but I'll catch it like a football
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Big fight at Bible group. Jeff said Jesus was a liberal and Cheryl said Jeff gave her chlamydia
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[shitfaced at my HS reunion] Has anyone seen the lunch lady
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It's one of my all-time favorites-- he posted it here, too:
bsky.app/profile/long...
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What if you die and you hate being dead
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[Werner Herzog voice] He is monstrous, but in a more profound sense, Cookie Monster is also a victim
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We all got that one homie who unleashes a swarm of evils upon the world
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I dated a girl in college who claimed to be a witch but it turned out she was just really into Kate Bush
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Telling a child that Santa isn't real is one of the hardest things about being a party clown
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Got kicked out of the death cult for bedazzling my cloak
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